Passionate in his opinionated reviews,Roger Ebertcontinues to wield the power of dividing movie lovers with his choices forthe best and worst movies of all time. With four decades worth of movie reviews for theChicago Sun-Timesand his famous co-hosted program withacclaimed criticGene Siskel, Ebert’s love for cinema and distaste for bad movies ricocheted through the cinephile and box-office community. He was authentic in his approach, never shying away from going against the popular vote and awarding one, half, or no stars to films that became cult classics, Oscar winners, and all-around fan favorites.
There was no genre left untouched by his crisp, cutting words, with a batch full of thrillers tallying up Ebert’s worst of all time and some landing on his infamous Most Hated List. Ebert’s controversial opinions on the thriller genre included low-rating movies that everyone else adored and respected likeThe Usual SuspectsandBlue Velvet. According to Ebert, the worst thrillers of his career included star-studded features, an underdeveloped sequel, a based-on-a-true-story creature feature, and many more numbing thrillers.
10’Color of Night' (1994)
Directed by Richard Rush
In an ambitious attempt to secure a place among genre greats likeFatal AttractionandBasic Instinct, this seduction thriller is a melodramatic whodunnit thatEbert called “a sex-crazed slasher film"with"a frenzy of recycled thriller elements.“Color of NightstarsBruce Willisas Bill Capa, a psychologist who develops color blindness after the harrowing suicide of a patient. After relocating to Los Angeles, Bill connects with his friend and fellow psychologist Bob (Scott Bakula), but a short while later, Bob is murdered and his group therapy patients are prime suspects. Bill takes over leading the group in hopes of uncovering who killed his friend.
“To call it absurd would be missing the point, since any shred of credibility was obviously the first thing thrown overboard.”
Besides its infamously rotten reception from critics and audiences alike, this film also raised censorship eyebrows for its addition of the sexual relationship between Bill and Rose (Jane March), some scenes including full-frontal nudity from Willis.A notorious one-and-a-half-star review from Ebertconfirmed thatColor of Nightis indeed one of the worst thrillers of all time as it smashed together the worst tropes ofAgatha Christie-style mysteries while trying to capitalize on the damning stereotypes of psychotherapy.Siskel and Ebert both boldly declared the film a thumbs down, Ebert bashing the portrayal of therapy to be more like a zoo than an accurate depiction of a group session.
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9’Snake Eyes' (1998)
Directed by Brian De Palma
For some,Snake Eyesis acrime movie that’s so bad it’s good(and to be fair, it got some good reviews), but for Ebert, it’s one of the worst thrillers of all time.Nicolas Cagestars as Rick Santoro, a corrupt detective, who attends an Atlantic City high-profile boxing match that turns deadly when the Defense Secretary in attendance is assassinated. With the entire arena locked down, Santoro must piece together exactly what happened to catch the killer. Ebert rated the thrillera lonely one-star in his review.
“It’s the worst kind of bad film: the kind that gets you all worked up and then lets you down, instead of just being lousy from the first shot.”
The final package of the film was a massive letdown for Ebert. The opening sequence, masterfully created by directorBrian De Palma,misled audiences and Ebert because it went all downhill from there.Snake Eyesretainsmultiple shining moments, includingCage’s performanceand De Palma’s overall craftsmanship, but those are disappointinglyoffset by what Ebert called “moments of dreadful implausibility,“culminating in a final third act that Ebert alluded to was a textbook mistake-riddled effort that is probably used to teach film students what not to do.
Snake Eyes
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8’Toy Soldiers' (1991)
Directed by Daniel Petrie Jr.
A “nothing new here” type of movie for Ebert,Toy Soldiersis “utterly predictable” and a one-star thriller. It’s a rebellious coming-of-age thriller about a group of prep school troublemakers who channel their unruly energy into saving their school from Columbian terrorists who take the students hostage to trade for their drug baron’s release.Toy SoldiersstarsSean Astin,Andrew Divoff,Wil Wheaton,Keith Coogan,Lou Gossett Jr., andDenholm Elliott. Ebert’s review aligns with the critic consensus, while moviegoers appreciated a Sunday-style popcorn movie.
“Did anyone connected with the production notice that they were making a movie that, in essence, had already been made?”
Ebert’s primary critique lies within the originality of the R-rated teenage rebellion film, and why no one sought to make it even marginally different. Its predictable formulas left Ebert believing “the movie is so disappointing that [he] wonder[ed] if the screenwriters were really trying.“In his one-star review, he praised the performances and production value, but it was not enough to make Ebert believeToy Soldierswas anything other than a bad thriller.
7’The Vanishing' (1993)
Directed by George Sluizer
If it’s not broke, don’t fix it was advice not taken by directorGeorge Sluzier, in Ebert’s opinion, when he recreated an American version of his 1988 French-Belgian hit,The Vanishing.The original Ebert praised as “one of the most intelligent thrillers;“however, the 1993 version starringJeff BridgesandKiefer Sutherlandwas “an insult to the intelligence and also, by implication, to American audiences.” In this crime thriller, Bridges is a serial abductor who unexpectedly confronts the boyfriend (Sutherland) of one of his victims (Sandra Bullock).
“I sat with a sinking heart as the movie methodically rewrote all that was good in the earlier version, turning its cold logic into trashy commercialism.”
Incredibly disappointed by Sluzier’s slashing redo of his original film,Ebert’s one-star review is provocativein askinghow filmmakers approach American audiences versus European audiences and whether is one more intelligentand/or worthy than the other. He doesn’t answer the question, rather leaving it up for discussion among his readers and fellow cinephiles.The Vanishingin its original form was a true psychological thrillerwhereas the American version is, in Ebert’s opinion, “laughable, stupid and crude.”
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6’The Ghost in the Darkness' (1996)
Directed by Stephen Hopkins
This dramatized retelling of the maneless lions of Tsavo wasn’t worth a full star, the acclaimed critic awardingThe Ghost and the Darknessonly half a star. This creature thriller starsVal Kilmeras Colonel John Henry Patterson as he travels the Tsavo River in Africa to engineer and oversee the construction of a railway bridge. He quickly witnesses the man-eating spree of the local lions and is joined by reinforcements in the form of famous hunter Charles Remington (Michael Douglas) to stop them.In his review,Ebert doesn’t touch on the fact that the movie is based on a true storyand that Colonel Patterson was indeed a real person who shot and killedthe lions which are on display at the Chicago’s Field Museum of Natural History.
Val Kilmer and Michael Douglas never for a second look like anything other than thoroughly unhappy movie stars stuck in a humid climate and a doomed production.
Ebert took issue with various production elements, like the staging of the lion attacks, and rather frantic editing that was meant to elevate the tension but only gave the characters, audiences, and Ebert whiplash.The staccato scene pacing grew monotonous only to be interrupted by scenes Ebert referred to as “so inept as to beggar description.“Its over-the-top dramatization became its greatest downfall in creating a monster movie instead of a retelling of genetic disposition.
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5’The Limits of Control' (2009)
Directed by Jim Jarmusch
In his playful review of this empty thriller,Ebert awarded only half a star toJim Jarmusch’sThe Limits of Control. In a dreamlike 116-minute runtime, the mysterious Lone Man (Isaach de Bankolé) travels through Spain, meeting strangers at cafés to exchange matchboxes, always ordering two espressos in two separate cups. Operating withinJarmusch’s signature minimalist style,The Limits of Controlis a visually appealing art thriller that somehow did and yet didn’t get away with its empty premise.
“[Jarmusch] is making some kind of a point. I think the point is that if you strip a story down to its bare essentials, you will have very little left.”
While obviously poking fun at the staccato, disconnected pacing of the film,Ebert’s review is poignant as it mirrors the viewing experience for his readers. Ameta reading experience, his half-star reviewsays a lot while saying nothing, revealing zero absolute truths about Ebert’s usually fiery opinion while simultaneously expressing his dissatisfaction with the thriller that was capable of more if given more.
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4’Body of Evidence'
Directed by Uli Edel
With a spot on Ebert’s Most Hated list and a star-studded leading cast,Body of Evidencecouldn’t secure a full star rating from the tough critic. With an on-the-nose title,the thriller featuresMadonnaas Rebecca Carlson, a young woman left $8 million by the rich elderly man she was having an affair with. While being prosecuted for intentionally having sex with him with the intent it would kill him, she begins a second affair with her defense attorney, Frank Dulaney (Willem Dafoe).
“It’s an excruciatingly incompetent entry in the “Basic Instinct” genre, filled with lines that only a screenwriter could love, and burdened with a plot that confuses mystery with confusion.”
Body of Evidenceis riddled with problems, from its “murky plot debris” to poor technical choices to the “bizarre sex” and copious amounts of implausible nudity.The movie intended to be a courtroom and erotic thriller set against a murder mystery, a premise that was doomed from the start, according to Ebert.His half-star review and elevated dislikefor the film led the critic and audience consensus thatBody of Evidenceis just a bad movie, in addition to one of the worst thrillers of all time.
Body of Evidence
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3’The Life of David Gale' (2003)
Directed by Alan Parker
A polarizing thriller that fumbles in hammering home its primary ethical objective,The Life of David Galewas azero-star thumbs down for Ebert and like critics, but a divisive win with viewers. The movie is told in real-time and flashbacks as the titular character, David Gale (Kevin Spacey), a fierce opponent of capital punishment, is given the death penalty after being convicted of the rape and murder of his fellow activist Constance Hallaway (Laura Linney). Maintaining his innocence, Gale offers the story of a lifetime to hungry reporter Bitsey Bloom (Kate Winslet).
“The secrets of the plot must remain unrevealed by me, so that you can be offended by them yourself, but let it be said this movie is about as corrupt, intellectually bankrupt and morally dishonest as it could possibly be…”
In a damning review, Ebert criticizesthe film’s choice of setting,Texas (the state with the highest execution rate), in addition to its messaging, saying, “I am sure the filmmakers believe their film is against the death penalty. I believe it supports it and hopes to discredit the opponents of the penalty as unprincipled fraudsters.“He acknowledges that well-done movies tackling capital punishment exist, but the convoluted and implausible implementation of ethical dilemmas inThe Life of David Galeisn’t one of them.
2’Death Wish II' (1982)
Directed by Michael Winner
A negative review he didn’t want to author given his admiration for the first film and its leading stars, Ebert maintained his critical authority byawarding this 80s crime thriller a thumbs down. The sequel installment in the franchise,Death Wish IIfindsCharles Bronsonreturning to vigilante justice as Paul Kersey when his daughter is murdered after they relocate to Los Angeles for a safer life. Kersey goes back to the streets to track down the criminals responsible. Ebert called the film a"disaster"that was"underwritten and desperately underplotted.”
“I award ‘no stars’ only to movies that are artistically inept and morally repugnant. So ‘Death Wish II’ joins such unsavory company as ‘Penitentiary II’ and ‘I Spit on Your Grave.’ And that, in a way, is a shame.”
His review expressed deep disappointmentin the follow-up tothe controversial thriller, where Kersey’s revenge tour felt justifiable despite promoting lawless retribution. Here, with an almost carbon copy repeat, Ebert described it as “a series of dumb killings.” Thecontinuing sequels through the rest of the 80swouldn’t fair much better with Ebert or crime thriller fans, opting for camp instead cinematic.
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1’Last Rites' (1988)
Directed by Donald P. Bellisario
Receiving number of negative accolades from Ebert,he dubbed this Tom Berenger-led film the worst movie of 1988, one of the worst thrillers of all time, and one of his most hated movies.Last Ritesis a confessional thriller about Father Michael Pace’s (Berenger), a New York priest, involvement in affair gone deadly when a wife kills her cheating husband and confesses her sins to Pace, while simultaneously, the husband’s lover unknowingly also finds solace in her newfound relationship with the priest. Inhis zero-star review, Ebert called it a “shocking exploitation of the religious material” with utter disregard for the audience” among other things.
“Was there no one connected with this project who read the screenplay, considered the story, evaluated the proposed film and vomited?”
With plot points that come across as twists but are just due to mismanaged filmmaking and poorly scripting,Last Ritesrelies on audiences to put two and two together that should have been explicitly revealed. Ebert takes aim at a number of the film’s wrongdoings, including how"the sacrament of confession is handled throughout this movie as a cheap gimmick, without the slightest evidence that any of the characters or filmmakers understand how it works.“Last Ritesoffers little to no redeeming qualities except it falls into the running fora movie so bad it’s laughable.
NEXT:9 Movies Roger Ebert Hated, But Audiences Loved
